Stay Still
by firelady101
Summary: Sonny cant handle life anymore. Not right now.So she doesn't have to.But when she tries to get out of this pain, she fails and ends up in a hospital she meets Chad. Her nurse and the only person there she will talk to honestly.With the stress of her boyfriend, fame and own struggles, she vents to him.And maybe falls in love with him, but runs away, back to her abusive life.AU/OOC


**Here is my new story :) I hope you guys like it! I know its not that long, but hopefully as I get into writing it I will wrote longer chapters :)**

* * *

She stared at the white carpet that was always kept clean. If anything got on it, she would normaly be in trouble, but she wasn't planning to be around to get in trouble with him anymore. She wasn't going to take it from him anymore. She _couldn't_. He was mean, mitupltive, abusive, and he made her hide from her fans, the people who loved her most in the world, even though he told her he loved her.

While his hand clashed with her cheek, he told her he loved her.

While his fist hit her gut, he said to never leave him.

When his foot kicked her in the back, he called her a whore.

And when she got something on the carpet, he flipped out and tied her to the staircase. Hitting her, kicking her and using her until he was satisfied.

But now, as she took a fresh box cutter she found in his tool box and dragged it across her finger tips, one single drop of blood landed on the perfect floor. She felt a sting of panic go through her body, but then calmed down when she remembered he couldn't hurt her after this was over.

She had done this before, cut herself, but on her hips. Places that he saw but didn't look closely at. Never on her wrists. She was too afraid he'd hurt her for it, so she kept it a secret. No one knew. Just her. And it was driving her mad. She wanted to go deep this time, deeper than she's ever gone. Deep enough to die.

She wanted to die on this carpet so he could come home to a mess. And it would be his fault, not hers. His fault for making her feel this way. His fault for making her still love him, but hate herself. She didn't know why she could love a man that beat her silly. But she did. And she couldn't help it.

She closed her eyes and pointed the blade to her left wrist, holding it firmly but shakily in her right. She bit her lip and pressed down, feeling the sharp sting go through her. She dug deeper, making tears form in her eyes, but she ignored them. She always ignored them. After she was done with that cut, she lifted her eye lids and saw that the carpet had even more blood on it, and she cried harder.

But she needed more. So she picked the knife up and put it on a new spot, going quickly this time. She did this several more times before opening her eyes again. Her once pale and porcelain-like skin seemed to have been dyed red. She cried harder, falling to the ground and landing on her knees. She felt her eyelids get heavy and smiled trough the tears and pain in her wrist. She wanted this.

She felt herself fading. But it wasn't enough. She pulled out a handful of aspirin she had pushed in her pocket before coming out here, knowing she might need a little help. She dropped them all on a clean spot next to her and her box cutter. She spread them out and took one at a time, counting as she went.

"One...two...th-three...four..." she whispered weakly until she reached 17. She was hoping it was enough as she sat and stared at her box cutter. Or his box cutter. And waited. But nothing was happing. She picked it off the ground with her clean hand and went after her thigh, digging in through her jeans. It was difficult. But she reached the skin and cut, cut, cut, cut.

Her pants became wet and ripped up. She was seeing stars. And smiled. She did it on her arm one last time. And then she looked up at the ceiling. Hearing the do-

...

The EMT looked at her pale face. She was breathing very faintly and being lifted off of her blood soiled carpet onto a gurney that would rush her to the nearest hospital. He turned to the tall brunette man leaning on the chair facing her. His eye were red, and his cheeks tear stained.

"You the one who called?" he asked. "Are you?"

"I am Thomas Grips. Her boyfriend."

"I'm Adam. You'll be coming with me on the ride there." He didn't ask. He ordered. "I need to ask questions." Adam gestured Thomas to the ambulance truck with Sonny in it. The lights were on as soon as everyone was in it. And they were off, to the hospital.

Thomas watched as one of the other EMTs put and oxygen mask on her face. Adam checked her pulse, he shook his head and wrote it down. The other EMT cleaned up her arm, with alcohol and gauze. Thomas felt his heart beat fast as he watched.

"Has she ever showed suicidal signs before?" Adam looked at him.

Thomas shook his head, "No. She hasn't."

"No cutting?"

Thomas was hesitant. "Well..."

"Well what, boy?" Adam was trying to get this over with. "Have you seen cuts?"

"I have. But I thought it was a phase. That she would get over it." Thomas looked down. "I didn't think she would go this far for attention."

Adam dragged a hand down his face. "She is on the verge of death, Grips." he whisper-yelled, annoyed. "Get your thoughts in order." He turned to the other EMT. "Abby, she needs her stomach pumped."

Abby quickly did what she had to do. Thomas watched her force a tube down her throat, followed by black liquid. Thomas rolled his eyes. He knew Sonny was going to be okay. She had to be. She had to wake up. He needed her. He loved her. And he also wanted her to know what she did was wrong. She got blood on his carpet.

...

Sonny heard beeping. Her stomach was sore. Her body was achy. And she had the worst headache.

"Am I in hell?" she asked, opening her eyes, seeing an all-white room.

"Nope." She heard a male voice, making her turn. She saw a tall, lean- but muscular blonde with bright blue eyes. "Or yes. Some people have diffrent opinions about this place. Heaven. Hell. I don't know. I think it's work."

"What?" Sonny looked around, seeing that she was connected to machines. And in a really uncomfortable bed. She turned to the man again, noticing he was in blue scrubbs. "I'm..."

"In the hospital." He smiled. "And you must be thirsty. Your voice sounds like you went to a concert."

She glared at him. Her throat did hurt, but she didn't notice it until he mentioned it. He walked over to her with a cheap looking plastic pitcher. He poured water into a glass and set it next to her on a rolling table. "Have some water."

"I don't want any." She shook her head.

"Your throat hurts. Doesn't it?"

She didn't say anything. She looked away. She turned and saw some flowers on the side of her bed, white and red roses. There was a card poking out. Her name was written across in sloppy writing she knew well. Thomas's.

When she tried to reach for it, her arm went slack and back on the bed. She felt weak. She turned her head to the blonde nurse who was checking her vitals on a clip board. She looked around for his name tag, when she found his ID clipped to his breast pocket.

**COOPER, CHAD**.

So this cute nurse had a name. Chad. It matched him. She didn't know how, but it did. She watched his arm muscles move as he wrote, and the way he put most of his weight on his left foot. His hands looked clean. And his eyes, just a glimpse at them, and she was getting lost.

He turned to face her and he smirked. "Sonny?" He waved a hand in front of her face.

"Y-yeah?" she blinked.

"Do you need anything?"

"Oh...um...can you read me the card? The one my boyfriend brought me with the flowers?" Then she thought for a second; she didn't know what the card said. "Actually, can you just...hand it to me?"

He nodded and walked to the other side of her bed, pulling the little white envelope out and handing it to her. She opened it slowly reading the sloppy print inside.

_Sonny._

_I don't understand why you did this. You're paying for the carpet. I'm going to see you later. And I love you._

_Tom._

No, "Get well." No, "Baby I love you and I'm sorry." Not even an "I'm sorry." This made her feel disgusted inside. Her boyfriend didn't feel bad. He didn't see what he has done to her like she thought. She felt selfish and wrong for her thoughts. She also wanted to get her hands on a razor.

"Why are you crying?" Chad asked her.

"I'm not."

"You are."

She touched her face. "Oh." She wiped the tears away. "I thought I was out of tears."

Chad just looked at her, giving her a smile. "Do you want to be left a lone?"

"Yes," she said, reaching for the water and taking a sip. The cold water made her throat feel so good she almost moaned. "I'd really like to be alone."

"Okay." He nodded. "Just press this if you need anything." He handed her a joy-stick looking thing connected to a long wire. "It's your nurse button." He smiled.

"Are you always going to be my nurse?" She kind of hoped he said yes.

"No."_ Damn_. "And yes. I'm your day nurse. We change shifts around 3 PM in the evening. I come around 6 AM." She nodded, taking another sip.

"I'll be out of here soon any way," she said matter-of-factly.

Chad gave out a chuckle. "No you won't be."

"Yes I will. I'm 19. Almost 20. I have money. I can do what I want," she said in a scratchy voice.

"You're on a hold. You tried to commit suicide," he reminded her.

"And...I failed." She looked at her wrist. It was wrapped in gauze. It stung. Her thigh did too, now that she noticed. She felt a tight wrapping around it, so tight she could feel her pulse. She looked at him. "Leave, please."

"Okay. I'll be back in 15 minutes." He turned to the door, his shoes squeezing on the tile.

"15?"

"Make sure you're not dead."

She leaned her head back, wishing she was.

* * *

**A/N: What did you guys think? :) Please leave your thoughts and review! :) Thanks.  
**

**And I deleted Bad Romance :P **

**Follow me on twitter :) fire_lady101**

**Love, love.**


End file.
